Create a Love Nest

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Tired of the blah and weigh-me-down feelings that come with daily doses of oppression?

Sick of racism making your kool aid taste bitter?

Fed up with feeling grey like the prison walls of incarcerated family members?

Well kids, today is your lucky day! We are going to build us an anti-oppressive, pro-love nest that will foster feelings of equality and get you feeling better in no time!

You know what they say, “an anti-oppressive measure a day keeps the doctor away!”

There’s going to be some steps that you’re going to have to take. Don’t worry it’s not as difficult as learning a line dance but not quite as easy as following the beat of a round dance. Or is it?

Steps to Creating a Love Nest

1. You’s a bad mutha- shut yo mouth! When you hear people gossiping about others, making racist comments (about ANY race), tell them that it is unacceptable and you do not want to hear the mental pollution any longer. They may get mad, you may lose a friend, but this is a vital step. Tolerating ignorance makes you a guilty party.

2. De-materialize. Try having a few of the good ol’ “buy nothing days”. Trust me, not supporting the capitalist structures that hold you down is not going to make you pull a casper and disappear. Understand that materials do not equate wealth and find out what your own VALUES are.

3. Ask questions. Remember when as a kid you would ask a million and one questions. “Why is the sky blue? Why is the grass green? Why do the other kids have nice lunches and I’m munching on pb&j?”.

Sh*t, you got stuck with pb&j everyday because of social inequalities that made impoverished conditions, first created by political structures and then enforced by racist policies and genocidal actions. Or maybe you’re family was just into peanut butter and jelly!

There is no such thing as a stupid question. Begin to ask questions again about why things are the way they are. If something does not make sense to you then ask why? If you want to see something changed, ask why not? A love nest doesn’t mean a conflict free nest. You need to do the work to get the good stuff!

4. Reject all the bullsh*t. Only you have control of your thoughts so steer that bad sally in the right direction. If someone makes a comment about a “drunken Indian”, identify it as a stereotype and realize that it does not apply to you and toss it out. Easy hey? No, not so much. You have to keep practicing the rejection of irrelevant information and comments that are complete b.s. and eventually it’ll happen on its own. This step works hand in hand with the next one.

5. Educate Your Self. Get out there and learn something. Crack a book or bust out an ear bud and crank an audio book. Have conversations on ending racism, or bettering your community with other people. Make a committed effort to learning your culture, traditions, and history. When you know the real story, the world makes sense. Scratch that, it probably won’t. There are no false promises here! Do I look like the Canadian Government? It may not make sense but you will understand why things are the way they are and you will have a good idea of how you can make change.

Love nest baby. Do it.

Helen K


  1. I really like this one. We all need a reality check on this. I like the one about just tolerating. I have to agree to this on sexuality too. I heard a pastor say that Homosexuality was evil and the church is going to hell for it because the Anglican Church New Hampshire somewhere in the USA ordained a Gay Bishop, Gene Robinson. Now I heard this and never said anything. I was so angry at myself for this and felt so guilty. I felt like Peter denying Jesus again. I have to live with that. What I really wanted to do was tell him to shut the fu*&k up and kick the shi*(t out of him. Sorry. But that’s how I felt and I did nothing. I have to live with that shame.

    1. Sometimes we don’t do anything and all we can do is make sure the next time we do. We have moments of weakness and we need to be able to accept that and forgive ourselves then move forward with the knowledge gained. I know how that feels… when saying nothing is more painful than saying something.

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